BREAKING: Drama Teacher Just Swore

Reports from students at Treehill Valley High in Charleston, SC state that longtime Drama teacher Mrs. Landry totally just said a swear word. The outburst reportedly came during a heated tech rehearsal of Seussical, with Mrs. Landry telling the cast they need to “get their shit together after that clusterfuck of a rehearsal.” Members of the cast were shaken by the event. “It was definitely a tense moment,” said Jenny Carter, who plays the Cat in the Hat. “I mean the tech rehearsal was a clusterfuck, but to hear Mrs. Landry say it – that’s when I knew shit was real.” “I was already nervous about getting notes from this rehearsal because I totally missed my entrance for the act two opener,” said Michael Rodriguez, who plays a Who. “But when a teacher swears, that’s like – whoa. It’s like, in theater, there are no rules.” Nathan Jacobs, a football player and member of set crew, says he also found the moment kind of jarring. “I don’t know, the football coaches swear at us all the time so you think I’d be used to it,” says Jacobs. “But when a tiny lady in a scarf tells you to get your shit together, it’s like, maybe I should finish painting the Truffula Trees.” This is reportedly not the first time Mrs. Landry has let a cuss word slip. “It’s happened when Mark and Kayla were doing their scene from Check, Please!” said Janelle Anderson, a senior. “She said it was some ‘damn good acting.’ I mean, I get it. Sometimes in real life, adults say ‘damn.’” Stage manager Roger Benson says he thinks the reaction was appropriate. “It’s clear that everyone needs to band together and make this the best performance of Seussical South Carolina has ever seen,” says Roger. “Mostly because I never want to hear her swear again.” When asked about the incident, Landry let out a deep sigh. “Listen, I know we’re not supposed to swear at school,” said Mrs. Landry. “But when it’s 9:45 PM on a Wednesday and Horton forgets his Circus McGurkus choreo for the 100th fucking time… it’s time for everyone to get their shit together.” Treehill High’s version of Seussical opens this Friday.


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