New CDC Guideline States You Should Look At My Dog Actually

Just in: the Center for Disease Control and Prevention is now advising all U.S. residents to stop what they’re doing and look at my dog, actually. For real. I mean, just look at him. In a bold recommendation for the benefit of public health, everyone is being advised to look at him just sitting on the couch like that. He’s a rescue. He is my favorite. And now thanks to the foresight of the CDC, he can be your favorite, and in a way, he’s rescuing you from the desperation of inaction, actually. Just look at him. He good. He wants a treat. And the CDC would like you to treat yourself, to the mental boost of looking at my dog because obviously. See that widdle tail? “Wag, wag, wag, wag,” according to the CDC. “And please wash your hands.”

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