Why Are Men Are Judged On Their Potential and I Am Judged On That Time I Keyed Dylan’s Car?

It’s no secret that women often feel they have to work twice as hard to make it half as far as men. Study after study confirms that while considering candidates for leadership positions, a man’s future potential is the main criteria; while for a woman, it’s often her past experience and performance. And is it my fault that my past performance includes keying Dylan’s car? Double standard! It’s classic workplace sexism to not recognize leadership skills in female candidates while searching for them in men. Do you know the level of leadership it took for me to locate and vandalize a car sitting in a crowded Stop & Shop parking lot at the height of rush hour without anyone seeing me? I mean, I spearheaded the entire thing by myself using only the tools I had on my person. Think what I could do for a marketing budget! A man is more willing to take a chance on a fellow man than me, a woman with a comprehensive resume of experience and one tiny transgression that led to a restraining order. It’s like, is this one mistake going to be remembered forever even though that’s exactly what a permanent record is designed to do? I’m competent, ambitious, and completed all of my community service (eventually!), but I lightly drag my keys across bright red enamel ONE TIME and all of a sudden I’m a high-risk investment? Fuck the patriarchy! This type of sexism isn’t relegated solely to the workplace either. In every facet of daily life it seems like men are always getting the benefit of the doubt while nobody even takes the time to ask WHY I felt I needed to lightly deface a 2004 Honda Civic while placing 37 phone calls and sending 89 texts before unloading a slew of judgment on me. Men are presumed to be competent while I have to continually prove I’m trustworthy by showing I can be within 5 feet of a vehicle without maiming it. I mean, car culture is so super toxic anyway and so terrible for the environment. Take the bus, Dylan! Also text me back. The sooner we dismantle the systems in place that prevent women from reaching our true potential the sooner we can close the gender power gap for good and Dylan and I can get married! Only then will we have true equality. The future is female! Unless you’ve committed petty vandalism. Dylan, are you reading this? Call me!

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